Fear Not For I Am With You

I thought it was over. The skies were clear when I decided to give my son a bath. Once again, he fought me. There wasn't enough water in the tub. There was too much water in the tub. He wanted bubbles...but not the Cars bubbles...he wanted the Dora bubbles. I was starting to feel a little overwhelmed with his demands. After the fifth time of me telling him to get himself clean with the soap, I got a call from my mom saying that there was a tornado coming my way. My heart raced as I rushed my son out of the tub so I could drain it & we could hop back in & take cover. Luckily, I still had an emergency bag in the hallway from last week's storm scare. Trying to explain what was happening and staying calm at the same time was a struggle. I hate tornadoes. Always have. And quite possibly always will. The hatred for these kind of storms has grown deeper since my son was born. I want to protect him. This momma lion was ready to protect him at all costs last night. My son wasn't too happy about having to get out of the tub to get dried off and ready for shelter. The battle started. As I was drying him off, he pushed and squirmed. He told me to leave him alone and that he wanted to get back in the tub to get clean (uhmm...hello, kiddo?! what did mommy say like 5 minutes ago?!). After the short battle of getting him to put his underwear on, I was finally able to grab the emergency bag, my purse, my keys, my cell & the charger, some blankets and some pillows. Man, oh, man do I wish we had a bigger tub! It was quite cramped in there. A new battle started with my child in the tub. The toys that I grabbed were not the ones he wanted. As my heart raced some more as the tornado sirens started to blare, I grabbed my son, held him tight and said "We need to pray, Emerson. There is a tornado coming this way. We need to be safe. I need you to trust mommy right now." He finally calmed down a little. We prayed a prayer of safety over our family, friends and ourselves. The sirens went off. But being an Okie and knowing how all of this works from past experience, we stayed in the tub a little bit longer. The sirens went off for a second time. My son mentioned the sound of 'the train'...all I could hear was the siren so I figure that he was talking about that. The storm finally passed us. We were safe. Alive. Well. I don't think my phone has ever had so much activity on it at the same time as it did last night. Text after text. I didn't have service so I couldn't call anyone. Talk about feeling helpless! I didn't want anyone to worry about us since we were fine. Texts from my mom, my dad, my best friends, my church family flooded my phone. And even though I wasn't able to call anyone, I was still able to text them back. I felt the love of my family & friends wrap around Emerson & I last night. I am deeply moved by all the support and concern these wonderful people showed for us. I didn't fully understand the depth of all the concern until this morning when I watched the news. This tornado touched down about a mile from my home. That's a bit too close for comfort. But today more than ever I am thanking God for his protection. I am thanking God for his arms being wrapped around my son & I last night. We still have a job to do while we are here on this earth. And that job is to lead people to become fully devoted followers of Christ. Thank you, Jesus, for a new day!

Distraction...

Ever feel distracted? Like when you are so focused then something catches your eye & you lose that focus? I feel it. I feel it in a big, bad way. And I don't like it. These distractions happen every so often to try to get our focus off of 'the One'. And by 'the One', I mean, God. The past few weeks have been filled with ups and downs in my life...distractions that are trying to pull me away from my focus. It started with the deaths of my great-uncle and a friend of mine. I took my first big hits then. But that didn't take my full focus away. I know that those two beautiful souls are enjoying the presence of Jesus now. The next hit was the big hit and it was most painful. My heart still hurts over this and it is something that I need to keep private. Something that I am still trying to figure out but learning to let it go as well. It is out of my control. With these occurrences, this verse comes to mind: 1 Peter 5:8 (NIV) "Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." When you know that you are on the right track & you have your eyes focused on the cross, the devil is ready for attack. He is ready to tear you apart...rip you to shreds! Satan will throw little 'distractions' out there to get your eyes off of Christ. With me, he tried to distract me with sad thoughts and fear after deaths. I was torn up after my friend, KJ, passed away because she left behind two cats that her family & friends did not want to care for. I took them in and my allergies went ballistic! Never in my life have I EVER had an allergic reaction to cats. I mean, hey, I'm a cat person! When I was a child, I would tell people that I wanted a cat farm when I grew up. (So thankful that God opened my eyes to this one & I only have 2 little fur babies to care for). I had to give those cats up after one night of them being in my home. I honestly felt like I had let down my friend. In my heart, I felt like I was taking care of her babies (KJ was a single woman with no kids...her furry babies were her kids). So I grieved. I cried. I had anxiety attacks like I had several years ago before I gave it all to Christ! And I thought "what is wrong with me?! This isn't me anymore!" With the "private" situation, Satan attacked my mind with thoughts of never being able to trust anyone. My mind was flooded with thoughts of the past pain I had overcome. With pain that I had dealt with for years and finally felt like I had been able to move past it within the past year or so. I began to think thoughts like "Why?! This isn't fair! Not again!" And that's when I dove into the Word of God! I've been reading a devotional called "She Reads Truth: Prayer in the Bible" and recently completed "She Reads Truth: Philippians & Colossians". These devotionals have helped me crawl out of this dark hole that I feel like I've been thrown into. My focus is still not where I want it to be completely, but I see Christ's hand reaching for me & helping me get out of this funk. My stubborn side is still saying "you can handle this on your own!" yet my mind is saying "Girl, get your act together. Christ is calling...you better hold tight to him!" "Rejoice in confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying." Romans 12:12 NLT. My hope is found in Jesus. This too shall pass and may God's will be done.